Emphasize The Positive Or Else

By James Robicheaux


Negative character traits define who you are just as clearly as positive traits. They too, are a combination of environment, experiences and values. However, unlike positive character traits, negative traits can lead to behaviors that could cause hatred, violence and even wars.

By treating someone dishonestly, or showing a lack of compassion, you are communicating that you do not care about that person. If that person also has a negative character and responds to you in a disrespectful, or aggressive way, then you have what is known as a conflict. A conflict that exists without a peaceful solution will result in hatred and violence.

Here is another example, let's say someone who is dishonest steals money from someone who is unforgiving. The person who was stolen from will try to retaliate against the one who stole from him. This too, can result in hatred and violence.

Below are a few negative character traits. Become familiar with them so you can eliminate these traits from your character if you recognize them in yourself.

1. Uneducated - Making a decision without getting all the facts. For example, your friends offer you some glue to sniff. You ask, "Won't that mess with my head?" Your friend replies, "Nah, it's safe and just makes you high." Without any further investigation, you agree.

2. Dishonest - To maliciously lie, cheat or steal. For example, you saw Paula take Marco's dictionary without asking his permission. But when he asked about it, you said you had no idea because you just don't like Marco.

3. Revengeful/Unforgiving - To want to get even or get back at someone; results from not being able to forgive. For example, Sally lent Jen her new pen, but Jen lost it. Jen did apologize to Sally and offered to buy her a new pen, but Sally did not accept Jen's apology. As soon as Jen got a new pen Sally took Jen's pen when she wasn't looking and broke it.

4. Unreliable - When someone cannot be depended upon. For example, Jill had promised to assist you on your math project on two previous occasions, but never showed up. So when she volunteered to give you a ride to the library, you nicely refused.

5. Impatient - To be restless or short-tempered and easily aggravated. People who are impatient are not willing to wait. They want everything right away and become frustrated when their desires are not met.

6. Aggressive - Capable of violent physical or verbal outburst. Carlos stepped on Rick's new shoes by mistake. Instead of waiting for Carlos to apologize, Rick immediately cursed him and pushed him against the wall.

7. Disrespectful - Lacking care or concern for someone or something. For example, your dad told you it was time to do your chores. You got mad, went to your room and slammed the door.

8. Hateful - An intense emotion that results in extreme dislike and hostility. Hate is derived from fear, anger or perceived injury. For example, some people are raised to believe that people who have a different skin color should be hated.

Do understand that nobody's character is completely negative and devoid of all positive character traits. Yet, most people do have some negative traits that they need to eliminate from their character. For example, someone can be a compassionate person, always looking for ways to help others, but is usually late for most functions and events. Or, he can be an honest person, but very impatient. Do these examples remind you of anyone you know? Do they remind you of yourself?

Not accentuating negative character traits means first realizing that there are some aspects of your character that need changing, then focusing on doing just the opposite of the behavior you want to change. For example, if you have difficulty being on time, you may try going to bed earlier and setting your alarm clock half an hour earlier than you normally wake up. You might even borrow a few books from the library on time management. The point is to focus on improving your character by eliminating the negative and accentuating the positive.




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