Getting Your Spouse To Agree To Marriage Counseling

By Marissa Velazquez


It is sad to notice that the divorce rate between couples is climbing at an alarming speed. Although each couple may have different reasons for separating, it is a fact that life is stressful due to high prices, low or non-existing incomes and the pressures of society in general. These factors do have a negative influence on marriages. In the past marriage counseling was viewed as a last and embarrassing resort, but now it has become an accepted process that can do wonders for a relationship.

If you are the one who needs to initiate the process of acquiring assistance, then you need to do it the right way so that your partner will be open to the idea as well. The idea should be suggested in an appropriate manner so that it is not misunderstood. Firstly, you will need to choose a good time to discuss the matter.

Choose your moment to bring up the subject carefully. If you or your partner is tired or stressed then it is better to wait. A time when you can both sit down and talk without any interruptions is best. Also, when you are alone is best, as you do not want to bring anyone else into the conversation. Your explanation should be positive, and in a way that will help your spouse to understand that it could improve your relationship.

Sometimes one half of the partnership has to go to see a counselor by him or her self. This can still be beneficial, as the person attending can learn better ways to cope within an argument and to bring about some positive changes. Often, the other party sees the positive impact on the relationship and then agrees to start seeing the counselor as well.

It is wonderful if you can come to an agreement to start seeing a counselor. It will surely be a step in the right direction. To help the process along, you can do a few things before your first session, or during the time you are visiting the counselor. It is helpful to be clear upon the goals you would like to achieve, therefore, write down what you and your spouse hope to gain from the sessions.

Try to write down the major factors that have a negative impact on your relationship. This will help you to understand the sort of problems that need to be solved. However, you should not only focus on the negative aspects, but on the positive things as well.

Don't forget to focus on the good things about your marriage as well. Developing a positive attitude towards each other goes a long way when trying to improve a relationship. Write down the good things, and try to stay focused on them, rather than on the negative aspects.

Marriage counseling is recommended for those having difficulties, but can also be useful for newly weds. Communication problems are often handled, but also more serious issues such as the death of a child and substance abuse. Look for a counselor that you can trust, and one that has experience.




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